Being able to say 'no' is a huge deal. In fact, it’s an art. Not many possess the skill of being assertive enough to say the most impacting two-letter word.
1. Realise the power of ‘NO’
Say 'NO' out loud. Loud, louder. Say it. How does it feel? Sometimes this is the toughest word to utter, but you won't believe how empowering it can be. Your 'no' can save your dignity. You can put your foot down and be firm with your 'no'. You can establish your disdain or dislike and walk away without explaining yourself. It’s a truly powerful word.
2. You must know when to say ‘NO’
Many-a-time we face a common dilemma - ‘How should I say no to the trip?’ or ‘How should I say no to that cigarette?’. We frequently have to face these questions, which we end up answering affirmatively, despite wanting to say no. And then it just becomes a habit to agree with things we don’t necessarily want to agree with. Therefore, saying ‘no’, before it becomes a habit to agree, is absolutely necessary, so that you can firmly tell people about your choices. Later on, they will never bother you.
3. You have to be selfish
Being selfish is not a bad thing. You have to put yourself first or else you will be bullied by people around you. Your time, health and wealth is important and there is no way you can let people decide what to do with it.
4. Stop being a people-pleaser
We want everybody to be like us. And therefore we struggle to please everyone by agreeing to all their demands. This makes us people-pleasers, who yearn for outside validation. You then have no say about your own wishes and demands, crush yourself under the weight of expectation. By not being a people pleaser, you are not entitled to obligations and live a life of your own choice.
5. Don’t let others manipulate you
By saying yes to each and everything, you enter a manipulation game where you then become a mere puppet, whose strings are in the hands of people who manipulate you. Only a stern ‘no’ can stop this manipulation game.
6. It doesn’t make you a bad person
If you don’t like a proposal, be brave enough to walk away. You will be labeled a ‘heartbreaker’, a b**tch, an a#$%le, but don’t accept something just to ‘not hurt their feelings’ and later on realise that you made a mistake and then break their heart. That would be too painful. Be clear from the start and explain your reasons for rejection.
7. Set your priorities
It’s when you say 'yes', that it’s clear that you haven’t set your priorities straight. It’s like walking on someone else’s path, and not yours. Therefore, set your priorities first. For instance, say 'no' to chocolates if you want to lose weight. Or say 'no' to a trip because you’re saving for a phone. This will help you be clear about your needs.
8. Saying 'no' diplomatically will not break hearts
Instead of saying 'no', try saying ‘I wish I could...but I can’t because...’. This will convey your disinterest in a polite manner.
9. It will increase your self-esteem
It is when the slaves disobey their masters that their self-esteem gives them new hope for freedom. Sometimes it's good to break the rules and do things your way.
10. You become brave and take responsibility for the consequences, whatever they are
When you take a stand against something evil, you become brave enough to face the consequences. Unlike when you say 'yes' to do something evil, you become a coward and try to escape the situation as soon as possible.
11. It's your life and it's your choice
In this YOLO generation, your opinion matters more than what others think. Life is too short to not listen to yourself. Therefore, it is necessary to follow the 'my way or highway' policy.
